The Tao of Homer

Feeling lost and adrift? Gain inner peace from reading Homer. Ermm, not the Greek guy. Homer Simpson. Here are some Homeric jewels to live by.

"The answer to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle. They're on TV"

"What's the point of going out? We're just going to end up back here anyway"

"Trying is the first step towards failure"

"You can't keep blaming yourself. Just blame yourself once and move on"

"Doughnuts. Is there anything they can't do?"

"The three little sentences that will get you through life:
No 1. Cover for me.
No 2. Oh, good idea, Boss
No 3. It was like that when I got there"

*taken from Reader's Digest April 2004

puzzling grammar questions

I found some questions in terms of grammar which really caught my interest...here are they...

1. If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

2. Why do we call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in the anus?

3. Why do we say " I slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?

4. If corn oil is made from corn and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

5. Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they clearly know there is not enough money?

6. Why are you "in a movie" but you're "on TV"?

7. Why do you have to "put your two cents in" but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

8. Why is it that 'bra' is a singular when it covers two things while 'panties' is plural when it covers only one?

9. If a person 'sing' we call him 'singer', if a person 'dance' we call him 'dancer', if a person 'play' we call him 'player', then why if a person 'rape', we don't call him 'rapper'?

anyone who have any answers or thoughts or ideas...please share them with me ;)

RON95 a.k.a minyak kuning

I was watching Buletin Utama just now and I just realized about the Petronas ad regarding RON95 (sorry, I know it is not a new issue, it's just that this ad is completely oblivious to me). I am not a big fan of Petronas and I would never fill up gas at any of its station. My family had many issues with Petronas since I was in primary school. And according to some of the mechanics and people who know so much about cars (petrol head), Petronas is a bad choice for anyone to fill gas. One thing that I personally found out about Petronas is that, from my experience, if you want to go further with a full tank (this is about mileage), Petronas cannot keep up with any other gas station like Shell, Esso/Mobil and BHP.



Coming back to the main issue here - RON95. When the government announced long time ago that they would replace RON92 with RON95, I always think it would be an irrelevant move. I mean, RON92 (minyak merah) is still frequently used by many road users especially in Malaysia. In our country, we don't have scrappage program. For those of you who do not know what scrappage program is, it is a government budget program to promote the replacement of old vehicles with modern vehicles. Scrappage programs generally have the dual aim of stimulating the automobile industry and removing inefficient, high emissions vehicles from the road. Recently our government announced to put this program into motion whereby any vehicles over 15 years old would have to be inspected at Puspakom every year or get a new vehicle. Of course this program would be opposed by many Malaysian road users since they are more than 2 million citizens involved in this 'problem'. Imagine 2 million vehicles over 15 years old - that's why I say that RON92 is still relevant to this day.

Another thing that was pointed out by one of the people in the ad was, RON95 is actually make you go further. I don't know with you guys, but I'm a bit baffled by that statement. I bought a motorcycle when I first came to Sabah. It is a Honda EX5. The reason on why I bought that specific bike was that it is the cheapest of all new bikes and I really hate anything second hand. I could fill up its tank full with only RM5 (using RON97, minyak hijau, the normal one that people use). I have tested the bike that if I go up to normal speed (in this case, 60-70kmph), it would go to 120 to 150km. But ever since I changed to RON95 (minyak kuning, like what they call it here in Sabah), it seems that my bike cannot even reach 100km. And this isn't just me. I only use Shell for my bike but then for those who are using Petronas, they would have the same complaint - RON95 cannot make you go further like what they claimed on tv.

Finally, one woman at the end of the ad make a statement telling us that RON95 is actually better for the environment. Now, that's what I call a lie. It may be bold for me to say things like that but I can prove to you. Picture this - although there are 2 million vehicles over 15 years old on Malaysian tarmac, there are more new cars on the road as well. And by new cars, I mean vehicles which are less than 10 years old. If you even look at your own car/bike and even your family's or parent's or friend's, most of them are using minyak hijau - RON97 before RON95 was being introduced. In our country there were only 3 types of fuel - RON97 (hijau), RON92 (merah) and diesel. RON97 is being the most environmental friendly while diesel harms Mother nature more than we could imagine. This is a fact. So, since when RON95 is better for the environment whereas people are using RON97 in which, it is much more better for our planet? I'm not making any speculation, I'm just talking using logic per se.

The only reasonable conclusion that I could come up from the reason RON95 is being introduced by our government 3 months ago is that, the government wants to take our money - as simple as that. Think again, the RON95 was being effective on 1st of September. Just one day before that, it was our independence day where our Prime Minister talked about many things especially on 1Malaysia and 'rakyat didahulukan'. The next day, came RON95 with a price of RM1.85 (5 cents higher than RON97 before that) and RON97 went up to RM2.05. Just a week after that, our beloved PM once again announced on tv that our government gained entry to the 2010 Formula 1. I'm a huge fan of F1 and I know to manage a team for one season, I repeat - one season, it would cost about 300 million pound sterling. Malaysia is not a rich country nor a developed one. We would need massive funding in order to stay in the business. I'm not making any reasoning based on inconclusive evidence nor accusing our government for sucking our money. No, my intention is only to discuss about the ineffectiveness and irrelevance RON95 - that's about it. In fact, to some extent I found that government's intention in pursuing in F1 is a good thing. But then please don't burden the citizen. Build an F1 car, build our own space shuttle or any other megastructure but don't torture us in the process.



All in all, I don't like RON95 - especially in Sabah where all petrol stations do not provide RON97 anymore. Seriously, if they still sell 'minyak hijau' here, I would stick with it for a long time.

p/s - it has been a long time since I last posted something on my blog...it feels as if I was doing a piece of academic writing...LOL

my year 6 and dictionary

this morning I was doing some reading with my year 6 pupils...the text was taken from the textbook...it was about animals migration...one of the examples was the Canadian geese which travel from the northern region of Canada to Mexico every year during the summer and winter...

suddenly one of my pupils asked,

"Sir, geese tu apa?"

I told them to check for the meaning in the dictionary...

not because I don't know what it means but all my year 6 pupils have dictionaries...every one of them...it's their own initiative to buy them before the start of this year...and I want them to make full use of it...don't depend on me so much like the other classes...

then I asked them,

"ok, siapa dapat apa maksud geese?"

one of the front seater replied fastly (they always compete to see who answer first)

"lihat"

I looked at him trying to guess what word he was actually looking at

"apa hal la maksud geese = lihat"

I took his dictionary and searched for the word...

...

geese lihat goose

the next thing that I could remember...I was banging my head onto the wall...

no wonder every time they asked me the meaning of a word and when I told them to look for it in the dictionary, they gave me funny answers...

one month before the big day

It is precisely one month before the big day...hmm...couldn't really say that I'm excited or anxious...the preparations for the wedding are still going on smoothly...

I got lots of questions from some of my colleagues like 'apa perasaan dah nak kahwin?' or 'dah bersedia ke nak jadi laki orang?' and many more...to tell you the truth, I'm not ready...

Think about it, can you really be ready or prepare for something no matter if it is a small thing or big...in reality - nobody can...there is a friend of mine who told me that she doesn't want to get married just yet because she is not ready to be a wife to someone...come on, you can never be ready for anything...let say you are going to die any moments now...when the angel of death come to take your soul, can you say things like “can you give me like one more year, there's so much that I haven't achieve in my life” or “can you come back later coz I have done lots of bad things, therefore I want to seek forgiveness first”

In the end, you can never really be prepared for anything...when the time comes, you will have to face it whether you are ready or not...as for me now, I am nervous...just thinking about what will happen, the responsibility that will be on my shoulder as well as all sorts of thing a man should do, deliver and take care of once he becomes a leader of his own family...my knowledge is limited...but I’m going to learn to give my very best as a good husband and dad for my loved ones...

p/s - just a quick announcement, many of you did ask when will be the reception in Terengganu...just want to inform you that there will be NO reception in my hometown...after lots of discussion with my family, we've decided to have only one at Asmah's house in Kota Kinabalu which will be held next month in June...so sorry for any inconvenience...

platinum...to buy or not to buy...

last week I went back to KL for my QUT graduation ceremony...at first I only took one day off because I don't want to stay there for long...but then my dad asked me to go back to Terengganu for one or two days to see my mom...so I asked permission from my GB to take three days off...

not much to tell bout the graduation...a bit sad coz not many attended...only 11 including me and I was the only boy...Nas told me he couldn't come...not sure why...but no news from Mie and Star...

I was wondering around in Centre Point Kemaman...went there to get my hair cut...suddenly, when I passed a game booth...I saw the new Pokemon Platinum...original...cost rm230...I stood there for almost 5 minutes...not sure whether I want to buy it or not...

if it were me last year, or the year before that, I would just buy it without any hesitation...but this time around, I gave it some thoughts carefully...

if I buy it, I wouldn't have the time to play...coz I brought my DS and PSP to Sabah and I haven't even touch them...they're still in my bag until today...and secondly...since it is more and less one month before my wedding, rm230 seemed quite a lot...I don't even go to mcD or kfc anymore on weekly basis like I used to before this...

so, I walked away and thought to myself...maybe next time...

in and out...up and down...

Me and my beloved Asmah just finished our kursus pra-perkahwinan last two days. Damn, it was tiring just to sit and listened to 12 ceramah in two days from 8am till 5pm. Anyway, it is useful and we’ve gotten the precious certificates to proceed with other procedures like filling in some more forms, carry out the medical test and so on.

It was the salary day yesterday. Some of the cohort 2 probably have gotten their slips. I on the other hand, still have to wait for next month to feel what it’s like to get a hold of my own pay slip. Many things need to be bought and done for the preparations of the marriage. Really can’t wait for next month.

The jemaah nazir is currently here in daerah Tuaran and Tamparuli for two or three weeks. Some of the schools have already been visited. I’m updating my fails but hopefully they wouldn’t come to my school. My penolong kanan has already being promoted and transferred to Kota Belud. So, now I’m the only English language teacher in my school. The newly appointed penolong kanan is adjusting the overall timetables and I heard the teachers have decided to let me teach English only and drop my Pendidikan Moral class. Good news eh. The catch is, I have to teach all six classes (the whole school) and after this, from 28 periods per week, I have 45 periods. S#@%

after one month in Tamparuli

Now, it’s about one month since I came to Sabah. Feeling quite settled here but I still preferred to be posted at East Brisbane State School (damn, I actually miss it). Haha. Now, let me tell you something about my school. My school, SK Bundu Tahuri, Tamparuli (actually the locals here pronounce it as TampaLURI, just knew bout it recently, though I thought I misheard them in the first place...lol) is a Pedalaman 1 category and situated about 18km from Tamparuli town. To be specific, only 4km is the main road, the other 14km is a harsh and gruesome gravel road (ask Mien, he had experienced it once...heh). The thing about the road is, I have to experience it every single day going to the school. This is because, almost all teachers live outside at the town except those who come from the village nearby to the school. And since I have moved to Tuaran after two weeks here, I have to travel about 30km to school (60km altogether) every day. But it’s ok, now I’m much closer to my loved one (only 3.5km from my rented house...hehe).

I love my school (small school)...I love the staffs (they’re all Sabahans)...I love the kids (all of them are Dusun)...I love the environment (there’s a small stream just next to the field...and the school’s surrounded by green hills...and it’s quite close to Mt. Kinabalu)...I love the GB who is really considerate by letting me teaching English only...and I love that I could use my hotlink number at school (but only at two particular spots)...huhu. Well, that’s how to sum up how I feel about my school. It’s indeed a very small school. Mien and Tiqah being posted to Pedalaman 2 schools and they have about 100++ pupils but here, they’re just 42 pupils here (like for year 5, there are only 4 pupils; 2 boys and 2 girls). All of them are Christians except one year 2 girl who is a Muslim.

In shorts, I love the atmosphere at my school - it’s not too hectic like KL. Because from what I heard from a few colleagues in Semenanjung, they have been doing lots of stuff and have humungous workloads. However, after one month being here, my only job is to go inside the class and teach – that’s just about it. Until at one point I feel like this is just a mere vacation for me. But then, I realised that I should be doing something like contribute for the betterment of this school. On second thought, I’ll think about that later. As for now, I just want to enjoy my ‘vacation’ ;p

Reventon anyone?

It’s not that I love to shop online like buying stuff on the eBay. But based on my experience (oh lama gile tak dgr ni...haha), sometimes, the things you wanted or imagined did not turn out to be like that. The photos might have small note at the bottom like ‘for illustration purpose only’. But today might be different. I just stumble upon something I never could have imagined to see in my whole life. Do you know the super-powerful-and-sophisticated-yet-really-limited Lamborghini Reventon? Yup, the one that is styled to look like F22 Raptors.



Well, the thing is, when this car debuted during the 2007 Frankfurt Auto Show, they announced that only 20 will put into production. And even if I or anyone has enough money (which is about one million euro or 800,000 pound sterling), all 20 of them have already been sold. So, there goes my chance to own one of the most powerful + exclusive + expensive + stylish + limited Lamborghini in history.





But then, today, I have another chance of getting my hand on this superb car. You see, some (actually most) people get bored easily. Be it with a cheap stuff, girl / boy friend, or at anything. People like the owner of the super-rare Lambo Reventon who, after just 75 miles in his new toy, has had enough fun and decided to sell it. Either that or the credit crunch has started to eat into the high-end supercar market. I suspect the latter (haha).

So, as for me, of anyone who interested in this ‘fun toy’, and if you have more than US $ 1,900,000, you can place bid for this car. Remember, it just has one owner and the mileage is only 75 miles (120km). Don’t miss the once-in-a-lifetime-super-golden opportunity ^_^

journey to sabah

hmm...I think I should have write about this three weeks ago but I just started blogging yesterday...and also my life had been quite hectic for some time already...anyhow back to the story...when I first knew that I got posted to Sabah, things weren't go well with me...to put it simple, I don't want to go...I don't have any solid reasons whatsoever but even if I don't get to be posted back to my hometown or anywhere in Terengganu, I don't mind going other places as long as it is still in Peninsular...be it to places as high as Cameroon Highlands or as far as Langkawi (I guess that is the furthest island from Kemaman...lol)...but Borneo...hmm...I just went speechless...

My dad always reminded me to ask for Terengganu for my posting...well, he just wants me to take care and look after my mom...and he also said that don't ask for Sabah or Sarawak because it would be difficult for any of us to travel around...but when I got Sabah, my family just went "nak buat macam mana, dapat Sabah pergi je la sana"...they kinda accepted the result...meanwhile, Asmah and her family were delighted to hear the news...I was still speechless...

I thought to myself "how hard can it be?" (quoted from Jeremy Clarkson)...then worst thing did occurred - I got Keningau...for most of you who haven't had clue or any idea how Sabah's map looks like...let me put it in a simple words that you can imagine...it's far from the sea and separated with other districts by the Crocker mountain range...and so far, I was the only IPBArian who got there...



my flight from KLIA was scheduled at 2pm...but then it was delayed for one hour and a quarter...by the time we (me and the other KPLIs from all over the country) reached KK, it was already dark...there were about 140 of us and the some officers of PPD Keningau waited for us at the airport with 4 buses to take us to Keningau...from what I've heard...there are two routes to Keningau...the old road is through Tambunan and the new one passes Papar...even most of the Sabahans themselves haven't been to Keningau because of the condition of the road...for those who had been posted to area in Keningau, like my uncle about 20 years ago...it was not a pleasant journey through Tambunan...if you thought the only way to be over the cloud is by taking a plane, you are wrong...you can be above the cloud by bus if you were to take this road...and only God knows how cold it is when we reached the summit called Gunung Emas...

we arrived at Hotel Juta in Keningau at approximately 10.30pm after three and a half hours ride...everyone seemed to be very tired and sleepy...we had to register first and get the room key...I was among the last person to register (my dad kept calling me to know my whereabouts and it got me distracted)...when I wanted to register, I couldn't find my name...I went through one-by-one in the name list and my name wasn't in any of them...I was sleepy and I couldn't care less...I just told the officers in charge that my name probably had been transferred to other district (even I don't know about it...just followed my instinct)...and because of that, I got a room only to myself (the others had to share three per room)

the next day I contacted my uncle who is in Papar and told him about my situation...called Asmah to help me find out my name at the JPNS...and my dad just to make him felt uneasy (lol)...after spending quite some credit...Asmah told me that her dad found out my name was at Tamparuli...and to make thing more dramatic, the taklimat was being held at the same time but in KK...after some discussion with Keningau's officers, the asked me to check out right away and go to KK all by myself by taking a cab...and I have to pay it myself...without thinking much, I took my stuff, check out, went to taxi station, off to KK (just like that)...

arrived at KK almost two hours later (thanks to the driver who was willing to drive fast through the mountain range, and the view was spectacular...will be going there again to take some photos...heh)...I had to pay Rm120 for the cab on my own (dammit) but I was quite lucky as by the time I got to the Airport View Hotel, they were still there...I managed to catch up with Faa, Yao and Dayah but Adel has gone to Ranau already...found the person in charge and got my posting letter...the name of my school is SK Bundu Tahuri, Tamparuli (I know it sounds weird but whatever as long as I can get out of Keningau...muahahaha)...then I got sent to the PPD Tamparuli...

there were 22 new teachers at the PPD and to my surprised there were only 3 from Peninsular...not only the other 19 are Sabahans, the live nearby to the school where the can travel from their house...most of them are from Tuaran (which is 10km from Tamparuli)...the furthest might be just Kota Belud (I think about 45km...not really sure...but they can still travel from their home)...the two girls from Peninsular have relatives in Sabah, so they don't have much problems in terms of place to stay...after a long introduction about Tamparuli, here are some that I could remember ;p

- popular because of the song "Jambatan Tamparuli" ;)
- about 37 schools, 70% considered pedalaman, but only 1 school is P2
- mostly SKM (sekolah kurang murid)
- the best district in Sabah (most of the school got 100% in UPSR) [note: pressure...hmm]

after the meeting, everyone went back to their home except me...I was still tired since first time landed here the day before...really wanted to rest and sleep and eat...my uncle came to get me and took me to his house in Papar where I spend the weekend there and prepared mentally for what is about to happen the week after...anyway my first 24 hours in Sabah was really chaotic that I already need a long school break...haha...will be posted about my school on the next entry...

I need to write

okay...the best word to describe me is 'lazy'. I admit that since long ago, I am not a hardworking person, I always leave my work to the eleventh and a half hour, and during my time at Ipba/Qut, my first draft will always be my final one. I just don't like to write. I used to like playing console games and owned a PSone and PStwo (and later, an Xbox 360) but after five and a half year staying at ipba, I just didn't have access to those sort of things. So, I decided that my next hobby will be sleeping. Actually, it was because I always waited until the very last minute to do my assignment, and that got me pretty worn out the next day and therefore I went into hibernate mode for minimum half a day. But then, while sitting down trying to figure out what to do during a free time, I came into a self-realization (it suddenly came out of nowhere). After all the five and a half years at Ipba and even after being given a golden opportunity to study and live abroad, I never try to develop myself professionally. Especially in terms of language. At the end, I never write better because I still got a C for my assignment, just like what I got during the foundation year. Plus, I'm still not fluent in speaking. I could say that during 2 years abroad, I will only used English when talking to the lecturers and when I want to buy stuffs at stores. On the whole, I only hang out with my Malaysian (Malay) friends most of the time. It sadden me to think that I really messed it up and wasted the five and the half years. And now, when I look at my friends, most of them have become much more proficient and managed to develop themselves professionally. I need to become better so that I can be a better teacher and the ones that will benefit out of it are my pupils. A few days ago, while checking on everyone's facebook, I found that Jarod described himself as a person who love to write and confidently admit that he is good at it. Most of my friends blog but I didn't fancy the idea of blogging. To me, it is like writing a diary, but publicly. When I read some of their entries, I realized that some of them shouldn't be shown to everyone. Well, that is my idea of a dairy - you keep it to yourself. But if I were to be a good at writing, I need to write A LOT. Then, after giving lots of thoughts, I think that I should blog even I don't fancy the idea of it. It is one of the way that I could better myself in writing. Well, even if you (anyone) don't like to read my entries, I write just because I want to be good at it.